Parents are tightening limits on children’s access to social media and AI

The rules vary; the unease does not

One parent, an AI specialist, feels caught between work that supports their children and technology they believe may damage those children’s economic or environmental future. They want their kids to learn about AI, but not to use social media. WhatsApp and in-person friendships are enough.

Another parent lets an 11-year-old use chatbots occasionally when they appear in Google search results during a shared search. The child is asked to check AI-generated answers and knows that chatbots can hallucinate. The family also avoids AI applications when the same information is available another way, because of the technology’s water and energy use.

For other parents, the limits are firmer:

One says children cannot use social media or chatbots, arguing that they should be taught about dangers rather than told simply to use the tools safely.

Another sees social media, video games, YouTube creators and Discord servers as competing with reading, outdoor time and face-to-face play.

One family allows a laptop for games but limits screen time. The parent says enforcement has become a stressful cat-and-mouse game as their 12-year-old finds ways around the restrictions.

Caroline Gray Ford, who doesn’t want her kids to use social media or AI. Photograph: Caroline Gray Ford

Schools add a second front

A parent who works with AI wants their daughter to understand and use technology, but objects to children becoming unwitting test subjects for products whose effects on learning, development and well-being are not fully understood.

The concern is not only what children do at home. The parent says AI tools are arriving in schools early, often without meaningful parental involvement or a choice. Another parent says their son was given a Chromebook at school without offering parents an alternative.

That leaves families negotiating limits around devices they may not have chosen. One parent says the lack of clear rules for children’s digital access forces millions of families to set their own, adding stress at home. They also argue that digital literacy and critical thinking should be taught alongside the introduction of these tools, rather than leaving responsibility to parents alone.

A collective response to a private burden

Caroline Gray Ford, a 42-year-old artist and regional leader of Smartphone Free Childhood, says recent lawsuits against Meta and decisions by authorities outside the US to restrict social media use by children under 16 helped her talk seriously with her daughter about age-related risks. Her daughter still asks to use those products; Ford says they agreed to wait.

Ford’s family is among parents trying to coordinate rather than set limits alone. She says many of her friends want to delay buying smartphones and allowing social media, and believe a shared approach would make family life easier.

I think the most telling tension here is that parents are not simply rejecting technology: some want their children to understand AI while resisting its presence in childhood on terms set by schools and companies. The missing piece is who takes responsibility when families cannot agree on the rules—or when a school has already put the device in a child’s hands.

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